The vigilantes took photos as they wrestled the thieves to the ground.

On Thursday, a group of five people attempted to make off with a load of watches from a posh London jewellery shop after smashing the window with a sledgehammer. They were foiled not by police, or shop security – but by a mob of more than 50 passers by and shoppers who jumped in and booted fuck out of the would-be thieves.

WHAT. THE. FUCK? What would make so many ordinary people risk the wrath of a sledgehammer to protect a load of watches and jewellery they could never afford, and that belong to a company that’s never done a thing for them?

Society has put a lot of effort into the vilification of the shoplifter and the thief – the government and the media have worked hard to make ordinary people think of theft as a crime on the same level as rape or murder, which it simply isn’t.

Who would have suffered if the sledgehammer gang hadn’t been thwarted? The shop would have had insurance to cover the cost of the products and the broken window.

Defending the property of private companies against people who want access to that property, or the power or opportunities that come with it, is nothing more than a defense of capitalism and inequality.

One new attempt to pit impoverished people against each other, and widen the gulf between so-called good and bad citizens, is a new scheme called Internet Eyes. Ordinary people can volunteer to sit at home monitoring CCTV cameras in shops, and notify the owners if they spot a shoplifter.  Their website says:

The sole purpose of Internet Eyes is to enable responsible members of the public to use the latest technology to help shopkeepers and the police combat the serious social harm that shoplifting causes.

The site is aimed at businesses that are too cheap to pay anyone to watch their cameras. Firms pay £20 a week for the service – much cheaper than actually employing a member of staff, and paying the tax, National Insurance and other costs associated with that. The volunteers, each watching up to four screens at a time, have the opportunity to receive a reward of up to £1,000 a month – if they manage to catch anyone.

Volunteers first have to pay a membership fee (£12.99 a year, £4.99 a quarter, or £1.99 a month). You are then rewarded for the hours you put in – if you watch the monitors more than 30 hours per month, you will receive a generous shiny 50 pence piece. More than 45 hours per month gets ￡1, and more than 60 hours per month gets￡1.50. Each volunteer receives feedback points from shop owners according to how much they spot. The volunteer with the most points at the end of each month will receive  £1000. If two or more volunteers have the same number of points, the money will be split between them.

So, if you’re poor and can’t find a job, you’ve now got a choice: go out and steal what you need to get by, or sit at home on the internet hoping to catch someone else stealing and get rewarded for dobbing them in.

And what happens when shoplifters do get caught? As we’ve previously reported, shoplifters in the UK are more likely to be jailed than sex offenders.

And in the US, vigilantism against shoplifters is just as strong. Last week, when a costume shop owner in Virginia caught a teenager trying to pinch something, instead of calling the police, he forced the boy to stand outside his shop for the rest of the day, in a Sesame Street costume holding a sign admitting to his crime.

Midgies bite a fisherman LIVE!

What is news and what’s the point of it?

It doesn’t seem to be about education, providing insight into global events or speaking truth to power.  These days it’s not even really news at all…it’s just crime.

Yesterday, a day where as far as we can tell precisely zero new developments in the latest media spectacle that is Raul Moat we still get blanket “news” coverage.  Channel 4, usually less guilty of sensationalist antics, dedicated around 50% of its broadcast to bringing us “the latest”…last night someone had robbed a fish and chip shop nearby (but not the guy they are looking for.)

We had an exclusive report about his Facebook page (he might be checking his messages apparently.)  If he watches the news he ‘ll be glad to see a criminologist offering some tips “start putting demands on the police…a time barrier”  he suggests, before saying its a bit “Rambo-esque.”   Yes, the criminogist came on TV, gave him advice and then compared him to Rambo! Next up, local MP (well ex-MP and from a wee bit up the road) enlightened us with “there seems to be a lot of stuff, certainly in the press.”  Quite. The evening was rounded off by local fly fishing instructor Kevin Dawson who said “fishing…midgies…police officers…with their wotnots…they’re doing their best as long as everybody’s OK.” Truly compelling journalism.

But why is the media so obsessed with this kind of crime.  Are we supposed to be scared? When David Cameron stands up in parliament and lies about violent crime that’s about fear. Crime should be worse than it is.  It’s a miracle its so low and who knows maybe as the ConDem cuts start to bite  we can have ourselves a crime wave.  Politicians and the media love lying about crime in order to create fear of ourselves.  We don’t go out onto our own streets making them more dangerous because the papers tell us not to. We don’t meet people on the street, do stuff on the street, talk about stuff on the street because we’ve been told by the media that the streets are full of…erm…us.

The BBC: Clarity on Crime

Fear also helps them push through things like stop-and-search, the useless anti-social behaviour legislation and the new brand of elected Robocops.  Electing police is quite possibly the worse thing we could POSSIBLY do. The person who stands to be a police chief saying “well actually crime is a bit more complicated than just clubbing young people to death and hating gypsies”  will get my vote…and no-one elses votes.  And we also know why the media love this kinda crime.  But really we don’t live in fear that the more grizzly of recent tales will befall us.  Rather something more sinister is going on.

Sometimes people do bad things.  Thats pretty much it.  Yesterday loads of people could have done whatever they liked and got away with it.  When you go into work tomorrow everyone will still be talking about this one fanny.  These stories are really just horrific filler to distract us, their morbid details give people in offices something to witter about in the months between Britain’s Got Talent and the X-Factor.  That’s the real point…Crime replaces news, debate, any kind of content or space and once again the tabloids have themselves a celebrity best seller.