Cantona kung fu kicks the banks?

Eric Cantona and Socialist Ken Loach.

Eric Cantona and Veteran Socialist Ken Loach

OOH AHH CANTONA – just when banks worldwide thought they were safe, Eric Cantona came flying out of the blue with a gallic karate kick to the very basis of international finance. Eric’s idea was simple, if everyone withdraws their money from banks, the banks won’t have any money or power, and if banks don’t have any power or money they won’t be able to influence politics, economics or society. Back of the net.

He outlined his thoughts here in the Guardian -

“We don’t pick up weapons to kill people to start the revolution. The revolution is really easy to do these days. What’s the system? The system is built on the power of the banks. So it must be destroyed through the banks.

“This means that the three million people with their placards on the streets, they go to the bank and they withdraw their money and the banks collapse. Three million, 10 million people, and the banks collapse and there is no real threat. A real revolution.

“We must go to the bank. In this case there would be a real revolution. It’s not complicated; instead of going on the streets and driving kilometres by car you simply go to the bank in your country and withdraw your money, and if there are a lot of people withdrawing their money the system collapses. No weapons, no blood, or anything like that.”

Unfortunately it was a bit shite and didn’t really work for some obvious reasons. People have money in their banks so it’s not at risk of theft, so it’s convenient to access, because almost all employers pay money direct to a bank and because they can get some interest on it. Also withdrawing cash might undermine banks but a) it won’t destroy them, they will still have money from commercial investments alongside punters money and b) if banks collapse what replaces them? Money to invest in the real economy like manufacturing would drastically fall and result in massive unemployment and chaos.

Eric Cantona executes his god given right of no platform.

Eric Cantona executes his god given right of no platform.

It’s a shame because Eric Cantona is still a pretty cool guy – he worked wi veteran Socialist Ken Loach in Looking For Eric, and has been supportive of various other lefty causes. His crowning achievement has to be his Ryu-style karate kick of a racist football fan, backed up with setting a press conference full of eejit journalists expecting him to apologise/make some halfway sensible attempt at justifying himself but actually making a cryptic riddle and leaving. Class.

If Cantona wants to take out the power of international capitalism he needs a new strategy – support the SSP’s call to take all the banks into public ownership, and instead of withdrawing all the cash invest it in a planned economy which puts social need and environmental protection before greed and pollution. Or just find Fred Goodwin and roundhouse kick him into the pavement repeatedly.

Just in case you missed it.

5 Comments

  1. Sarah says:

    If everyone goes and withdraws their money for the banks, well done to the first couple of hundred thousand that get there first. The rest will lose ALL their money as the bank collapses and refuses to pay it out.

  2. Euan Benzie says:

    Eric Cantona; an over-rated footballer and shite actor but if he roundhouse kicked Fred Goodwin I would forget all of that.

  3. Pavel says:

    Euan Benzie are you the devil in disguise how dare you state Eric Cantona is over rated he is a fucking legend and how can he be shit at playing himself he can’t its just not possible.

    I think you are being severely unfair on Eric he did put a valid point and the withdrawing of money would be more devastating than most street marches due to the international power of banks an individual country or a group of countries can be effectively ignored or at least the people.

    A planned economy often does not work out exactly the way you want it Mussolini mostly failed on this although others have suceeded but then you would have to have a global planned economy instead of working on small country wide economies protectionism doesn’t work for a low resource country like Britain or Scotland. My own believe is that basics should all be nationalised because there is no benefits whatsoever to them being privatisied. Gas, Water, Power and transport for the most part are all monoplised and prices are driven high due to no competition.

    Transport I would also state because not only is it easily monoplised but most of the infractstructure i.e. roads and railways are all maintained by the government at this moment anyway and any upgrade is mostly financed by the government.

  4. Euan Benzie says:

    Maybe the fact that he scored few goal in the champions league and most his goals for Man U were against the diddy teams of the Premiership and the fact that he got so few caps for a great France national team might add to my evidence of him being over-rated. The film looking for Eric is the most self indulgent films I’ve ever watched if that’s him being himself then he has an awful personality.

    As for withdrawing all money this would spell disaster for those who don’t get there in time.

  5. Raphie says:

    Great footballer and loved Looking for Eric but the analysis on the banks here is great. It was run on deposits that party caused the last leg of the Irish crisis. Eric should be demanding the banks are taken under common ownership and control. And Robin hood tax another half baked idea. We would end up paying for that through our pensions and indurancve polcies. Also most tranacations are not officially recorded. So difficult to police and always some dodgy place they book the trades. How about 100% tax aabove £100,000 salary and 95% tax in investment banking profits that would soon stop them speculating.