Nick Clegg has been reaping the rewards of being the only person in the Leader’s TV debates who wasn’t in Labour or the Tories. Yesterday, a yougov poll was released that showed Clegg is now enjoying almost the same levels of popularity as Winston Churchill at the height of his power.

But some are concerned that the popularity has gone to his head, as today Clegg sensationally claimed “I think we’re more popular than Jesus now.”

Speaking live from a bed-in protest to demand the continuation of the war in Afghanistan, Clegg claimed that he had more influence over kids than the son of God. He argued that the Lib Dems now represented the proud Biblical tradition of standing for several contradictory things at once, depending on who they’re talking to at the time. He also unveiled his fetching new Lib Dem robes he intends to show off at the next TV debate, whilst Vince Cable and other disciples listened enraptured to his every word and washed his feet.

Lib Dems have argued that nothing will ever be the same after Clegg’s performance in the TV debates, claiming he is the messiah, the only one true God-man who can cut spending, slash services and throw people out of work by spreading the gospel of the Lib Dem manifesto.

However, the remarks have sparked controversy and outrage from religious believers unimpressed by the new cult of Cleggianity. The Pope, desperate to distract attention from his own PR difficulties said: “I am disgusted by these blasphemous Lib Dem comments. I believe Nick Clegg is part of the same alliance of Jews, homosexuals and Satan that have made up all this malicious gossip about me.”

But Clegg turned the other cheek to the attacks, saying: “The Pope, like Gordon Brown and David Cameron, is a nowhere man. With a little help from my friends, we can work it out. Our message in this election is that we should all just Come Together, right now, over me.”

(If you have no idea what this post is about, you might want to check this. Additional images by Liam T.)

Faithful Lib Dems receive the word of Clegg

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